When I was around 12 years of age, my mother was pregnant with her fourth child. For those who follow the column, you know that I was born when my mother was 19, and my younger brother was born when my mother was 20. After her remarriage, when I was about 11 years old, my mother and stepfather had their first child, a little baby boy. So, my Mom would have been in her early 30s when she was pregnant with her fourth child. Unfortunately, this child died in my mother’s womb. It was a very difficult time for her.

I remember being in the hospital when she lost that little baby – she still delivered the baby, a little baby boy, with the knowledge that he was no longer alive. From what I recall, he had not made it to full term – and I really cannot say what happened to him – and I am not sure that anyone ever knew. After the delivery, my mother and stepfather had my brother and I come into the hospital room to say goodbye to the little brother that we would never know in this world.

Time plays tricks with memories – but I have a vivid recollection of that night. My mother was still in her hospital bed when my stepfather brought us into the room. She smiled at us – as if to reassure us that she was fine, but the smile never touched her eyes. There was a deep sorrow there that I now know that no man will ever truly comprehend. I saw the little hospital bassinet sitting at the side of her bed with a tiny, little baby boy resting there – so peaceful and so perfect in every little detail except that he was not breathing. From what I can recall he was around 5 to 6 months old. I remember that my mother kept his footprint in a small china piece on her hutch – and my sister later told me that the footprint measured about 1 inch in length.

My mother encouraged us to move a little closer to her and the bassinet – and then she told us that our little brother was in a better place and that God called him home. She told us that she wanted us to see him – and that she wanted us to remember him. She reaffirmed what I was thinking – just how perfect he was – like a little play doll etched in exquisite detail. In her pain and sorrow, she used her tears to teach us a lesson. She told us that we would find people in this world who would tell us that our brother was not a baby – just a fetus or a mass of cells. She needed for us to know the truth – as if my brother’s death would serve a greater cause by making his older brothers understand the sacredness of life.

There may be some people out there questioning my mother’s decision to expose her young children to this kind of trauma. I know that my mother always wondered if she did the right thing – but she never said a word about it until I sent her a note one day to thank her for what she did. I was prompted to let her know my feelings after a saw a story about a pro-life group being prosecuted for disorderly conduct as a result of their decision to show pictures of aborted children at a public demonstration. I was surprised when she responded with such relief as I never knew that she was afraid she had done the wrong thing – that she had mentally or emotionally scarred us in some way. I told her that she had not scarred us – in many ways she had vaccinated us against an increasingly cold and secular world. When she died in March 2010, my little brother’s footprint went into the coffin with her – there was never truly anyway to separate them.

After her death, we started a scholarship for my mother at the Community Foundation of the Endless Mountains – and it is awarded yearly to a Susquehanna County student that writes a winning essay on his or her pro-life values and convictions. My mother’s birthday is January 26th, which coincides with this year’s Walk for Life in Washington, D.C., which will be held on Friday, January, 25th. As a tribute to my mother and her values, and to celebrate and reaffirm our own commitment to the sacredness of human life, we have planned a Breakfast for Life at the Community Foundation building on her birthday, Saturday, January 26, 2013 beginning at 8:30 am. There will be a small program including various clergy at the function – and there is no cost to attend though donations to the scholarship fund will be accepted if you feel so inclined. As we had no way of predicting the response to such an event, the seating is somewhat limited – if you are interested, call Martha Cuomo at 278-5061 to make a reservation. We would love to see you there.

Please submit any questions, concerns, or comments to Susquehanna County District Attorney’s Office, P.O. Box 218, Montrose, Pennsylvania 18801 or at our website www.SusquehannaCounty-DA.org or discuss this and all articles at http://dadesk.blogspot.com/.